I'm having one of those frustrating Saturday nights tonight.
You know the type of Saturday night I am talking about. You're alone (literally or figuratively). Your body is tingling with arousal and sexual desire from head to toe. It seems like there is nothing else in the world besides you and your desperate longing for somebody's touch. One of those nights where masturbation just isn't enough. You need that feeling of skin on skin, you need to hear the moans of someone else reflecting the pleasure that you are also feeling.
Sounds good so far, right? But here comes the frustrating part.....there is no one to fill this need for me tonight. The woman I have been casually seeing recently is not around. And I even went so far as to make a couple of calls to some women from the past that I still hook up with from time to time (one of which was a CL girl, though we haven't gotten to her story yet). But alas, they were not available.
Don't get me wrong, the bachelor lifestyle has its perks. Significant perks, in fact. But this is a big downside. To feel this way tonight, and not have a significant other to indulge in these desires, is borderline torture. I'm so turned on that I might even be willing go for phone/cyber sex tonight! Yes, the need is that strong.
I have so many fantasies running through my mind right now that it's hard to even keep track. For tonight though, they seem destined to remain fantasies. Unfulfilled desires.
I'm sure everyone has nights like this. Doesn't it suck?
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Encounters #6 and #7: No Touching Allowed
Up to this point, I think I had been handling my CL posts pretty well. The posts were well-written, suggestive without being offensive, focused on her pleasure as opposed to mine.....all good stuff. And I had been getting pretty good results, overall.
But as such things usually go, it was only a matter of time before I was just a little too slick for my own good. As I mentioned in my last post, my thought process was that since my massage posts so were so successful, there had to be other 'gateway' activities I could introduce to get even more responses. To recap, gateway activities are things like massages that are innocent seeming and don't scare people away, but set the right mood for things to eventually progress to naughtier activities.
So, what other gateways could I create. Hmmmm. Then it came to me. What about phone sex?? Or cyber sex?? Safe, anonymous, non-threatening. Yet still enjoyable. Yes, that fits the criteria for gateway activities! I It was decided.....I immediately created new posts, highlighting cyber sex and phone sex respectively (in separate posts of course, to not alienate people only interested in one or the other).
The initial returns were great. Several responses. A few non-starters, as always, but also a few legitimately interested ladies. Two in particular....one answering my phone sex post, and the other my cyber sex post.
To make a long story short, I eventually began engaging in the two respective activities with both ladies. Both were kinda fun the first time. A little less fun the next time. Kinda redundant the third time. You get the idea. After the third time with each person, I said to myself, ok, it's time to strike. The gateway has been established, and it's now time to cross over!
Not so fast. Neither had any interest in taking things to an in-person level. They were perfectly content with these anonymous, masturbatory sessions. They were both too nervous to meet in person, for different reasons (one married, one self-conscious). But they were more than happy to continue on with the calls and emails/IMs. I was not though, and told them I was going to move on.
Lessons learned. First, cyber sex and phone sex are overrated, if not part of a bigger, physically involved relationship. Second, not all gateways actually lead to something better. Sometimes the gateway is just the end of the road!
It was time to regroup.
But as such things usually go, it was only a matter of time before I was just a little too slick for my own good. As I mentioned in my last post, my thought process was that since my massage posts so were so successful, there had to be other 'gateway' activities I could introduce to get even more responses. To recap, gateway activities are things like massages that are innocent seeming and don't scare people away, but set the right mood for things to eventually progress to naughtier activities.
So, what other gateways could I create. Hmmmm. Then it came to me. What about phone sex?? Or cyber sex?? Safe, anonymous, non-threatening. Yet still enjoyable. Yes, that fits the criteria for gateway activities! I It was decided.....I immediately created new posts, highlighting cyber sex and phone sex respectively (in separate posts of course, to not alienate people only interested in one or the other).
The initial returns were great. Several responses. A few non-starters, as always, but also a few legitimately interested ladies. Two in particular....one answering my phone sex post, and the other my cyber sex post.
To make a long story short, I eventually began engaging in the two respective activities with both ladies. Both were kinda fun the first time. A little less fun the next time. Kinda redundant the third time. You get the idea. After the third time with each person, I said to myself, ok, it's time to strike. The gateway has been established, and it's now time to cross over!
Not so fast. Neither had any interest in taking things to an in-person level. They were perfectly content with these anonymous, masturbatory sessions. They were both too nervous to meet in person, for different reasons (one married, one self-conscious). But they were more than happy to continue on with the calls and emails/IMs. I was not though, and told them I was going to move on.
Lessons learned. First, cyber sex and phone sex are overrated, if not part of a bigger, physically involved relationship. Second, not all gateways actually lead to something better. Sometimes the gateway is just the end of the road!
It was time to regroup.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Are Cybersex and Phone Sex Overrated?
This is another post that doesn't qualify as a "tangent", since it will segue us into Encounter #6. Just in case anyone was wondering!
So, we have already discussed how shower sex is vastly overrated. I now propose two more forms of "sex" (if they really even qualify) that are highly overrated: Cybersex and Phone Sex.
Now to be fair, like shower sex, Cybersex and Phone Sex both sound pretty good in theory. It seems like it would be exciting to email naughty messages back and forth while both parties pleasure themselves. And it seems like it would be even hotter to hear someone's moans over the phone as they touch themselves while listening to your moans as you do the same. They both actually sound quite stimulating!
This is the first problem. For me, anyway. It's masturbation. You're getting yourself off. The other person is getting themselves off. You can't see them or touch them. As far as the visual (sort of) and audio stimulation received from Cyber and Phone Sex respectively.....I can accomplish that with porn. And at least porn gives me a good visual to work with.
And here's the bigger problem....Cybersex and Phone Sex are ultimately a tease. It just makes you want physical contact with the person more. When you often can't have it. Now, might this be fun once in a while during the course of a long term relationship, maybe when one person is away on business while the other is home? Of course! That is not the type of scenario that I'm talking about here though. I'm talking about meeting new people, wanting to have hot, in-person sex with them, but they cannot move past the "safety" and anonymity of cyber or phone encounters. It's as frustrating as hell, and as I've found, more common that you might think. It's like hearing the steak sizzle on the grill, smelling the delicious aroma, and then never getting to taste it. What's the point??
As you will soon learn, I only have myself to blame for getting stuck in some of these scenarios. Remember when we said a good massage was like a gateway drug, and always leads to better things? Well, I thought that perhaps the same principle might apply if I used Cyber/Phone Sex as the selling point on my Craig's List posts.
I was wrong. Details to come......
So, we have already discussed how shower sex is vastly overrated. I now propose two more forms of "sex" (if they really even qualify) that are highly overrated: Cybersex and Phone Sex.
Now to be fair, like shower sex, Cybersex and Phone Sex both sound pretty good in theory. It seems like it would be exciting to email naughty messages back and forth while both parties pleasure themselves. And it seems like it would be even hotter to hear someone's moans over the phone as they touch themselves while listening to your moans as you do the same. They both actually sound quite stimulating!
This is the first problem. For me, anyway. It's masturbation. You're getting yourself off. The other person is getting themselves off. You can't see them or touch them. As far as the visual (sort of) and audio stimulation received from Cyber and Phone Sex respectively.....I can accomplish that with porn. And at least porn gives me a good visual to work with.
And here's the bigger problem....Cybersex and Phone Sex are ultimately a tease. It just makes you want physical contact with the person more. When you often can't have it. Now, might this be fun once in a while during the course of a long term relationship, maybe when one person is away on business while the other is home? Of course! That is not the type of scenario that I'm talking about here though. I'm talking about meeting new people, wanting to have hot, in-person sex with them, but they cannot move past the "safety" and anonymity of cyber or phone encounters. It's as frustrating as hell, and as I've found, more common that you might think. It's like hearing the steak sizzle on the grill, smelling the delicious aroma, and then never getting to taste it. What's the point??
As you will soon learn, I only have myself to blame for getting stuck in some of these scenarios. Remember when we said a good massage was like a gateway drug, and always leads to better things? Well, I thought that perhaps the same principle might apply if I used Cyber/Phone Sex as the selling point on my Craig's List posts.
I was wrong. Details to come......
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Tangent #5: Sex Stats
For whatever reason, I enjoy reading about sexual statistics. I guess everyone wants to get a sense of how they stack up against everyone else, and how their relationship fares in comparison to others, right?
Well in the spirit of such curiosity, I present the results of the most current research I could find on random sexual statistics and averages. Some interesting stuff here....
1. Average erect penis length: 6 inches (phew)
2. Average clitoris length: 1 inch (seems a tad high, from my experience)
3. Average person has sex 127 times per year (about once every 3 days....a little more than I would have expected)
4. 48% of women polled have admitted to faking an orgasm ('admitted' being the key word)
5. Unmarried couples living together have sex 147 times per year on average. Married couples....98 times per year (why do people get married???)
6. Average calories burned during 30 minutes of sex: 200 (who needs the gym?)
7. Percent of people who have had sex with a co-worker: 20% (definitely low)
8. Percent of people satisfied with their sex life: 48% (less than half......kinda sad.....)
9. Percent of women reaching orgasm through intercourse: 45% Through oral sex: 80% (seems close)
10. 25% of people have had 1 sexual partner......21% of people have had 10 or more (thank goodness I'm in the 2nd group! those poor 25%)
Well in the spirit of such curiosity, I present the results of the most current research I could find on random sexual statistics and averages. Some interesting stuff here....
1. Average erect penis length: 6 inches (phew)
2. Average clitoris length: 1 inch (seems a tad high, from my experience)
3. Average person has sex 127 times per year (about once every 3 days....a little more than I would have expected)
4. 48% of women polled have admitted to faking an orgasm ('admitted' being the key word)
5. Unmarried couples living together have sex 147 times per year on average. Married couples....98 times per year (why do people get married???)
6. Average calories burned during 30 minutes of sex: 200 (who needs the gym?)
7. Percent of people who have had sex with a co-worker: 20% (definitely low)
8. Percent of people satisfied with their sex life: 48% (less than half......kinda sad.....)
9. Percent of women reaching orgasm through intercourse: 45% Through oral sex: 80% (seems close)
10. 25% of people have had 1 sexual partner......21% of people have had 10 or more (thank goodness I'm in the 2nd group! those poor 25%)
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